Hello to all,
It is that time of year when the night’s temperature falls to good sleeping conditions. Instead of the air conditioner running all night, we sleep with a window open as a fan blows cool air into our room. The cool fall temperatures also reassure husbands around the northern hemisphere of their importance in the house.
Recently, the overnight low dropped into the forties, and no fan was required to keep the bedroom cool. This also means bugs living in the wild surrounding our home try to infiltrate the walls for a warmer environment. The most insidious of these bugs are spiders. I know this because of the ear-piercing scream, “SPIDER!” blaring throughout the house. To hear the urgency of the warning, I picture a spider the size of a car, a bus, or an aircraft carrier.
I don my superhero cape and become the Great Spider Killer. Armed with a size ten shoe, I hunt for this sinister intruder in our home. Feeling confident in my role as spider killer extraordinaire, I follow the sound of shrieking, a cry of salvation from the treacherous trespasser. I am met by a spider climbing the wall, and he is a big boy. I steady my nerves as my eyes meet the eyes of this steely monster. With a quick flip of my wrist, the creature of doom meets his end.
I walk away with imaginary explosions behind me as my wife and daughter cheer over their hero during the spider wars that happen every autumn in our humble home. The accolades thrown at me every fall ensure that my place in the home is secure for another year. Despite my faults and misgivings, my wife of over thirty years will keep me for another year, for I am the Great Spider Killer of the home.
This admiration for my power of being the Great Spider Killer builds confidence in me. My day feels lighter, and I become more affable. Tammy says it makes me unbearable because I become more annoying, and the frequency I pick on her rises tenfold. “That is the price to pay to live in a spider-free home,” I smile back at her.
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God bless,
Danny Mac
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